Aaron and my sister felt all was accomplished. My sister left our home thinking a job well done on her part and symbolically speaking patting herself on her back. I on the other hand knew this was just the beginning. The beginning of what I did not know, nor did I know how long or where this journey would take us.
I spoke later that evening with my husband after Aaron had gone to sleep. I told him of the day’s events. Now was the time to get real, and to do so fast. Time would not be on our side. I had to convince my, “all he has to do is exercise” husband that Aaron’s breasts were not due to Aaron’s weight or exercise routine. Aaron’s breasts were those of a female and larger than my breasts. They were larger than the breasts women pay plastic surgeons for breast enhancement surgery. His female-like nipples were large in circumference, quite opposite of small male nipple. His hips were rounding. He was now in the 7th grade and his voice was becoming more like a woman. His skin was as I said, peaches and cream. There was no male voice box developing, or fine hair patches developing on his face. Females tend to reach puberty sooner than males. This was the exact time a female would enter puberty. Our son was going through female adolescence and there was no stopping this train.
A weary and long night of heated discussion between my husband and myself ended in compromise. I was in the business of diabetes and the endocrine system. I knew the entire specialist groups of endocridology in our large city. We agreed I was to make an appointment with a Pediatric Endocrinologist. I worked closely with the best Pediatric Endocrinologist in the city. The next morning I made an appointment for Aaron to see him for the first time as a patient. They were able to fit him in soon, since I was acquainted with everyone.
The day came when we took Aaron to the hospital where he would meet with his specialist and have a battery of tests run. Everyone was kind to Aaron; he had been in their office several times before on, “Take Your Child to Work Day.” This time it was different. I could feel the tension in the air. Aaron was young enough, he now he hated his new appearance and his voice tone. All Aaron cared about was getting back to “normal.” They drew blood, took X-Rays of his hand to determine his adult size, and multiple examinations. I waited nervously with the clinic’s head nurse, Leah; and she tried to reassure me all would be all right. I felt, the more encouragement Leah gave, the more doubt reflected from her face. Aaron’s tests were over and we rescheduled a return visit to receive his results.
Our scheduled return date had arrived; the results of Aaron’s tests and examinations were available for review and discuss Aaron’s options. Our little family went together as a unit to hear the news. My husband, my son, and myself sat down in front of the physicians massive meticulously hand carved wooden desk. The beauty of his office did not draw our attention away from the reason we were there. The doctor came in and we exchanged our niceties. I was in no mood to wait and spouted out, “Well, let’s get on with it, what’s Aaron’s prognosis?” It was just as I feared; Aaron was producing high amounts of estragon (the female hormone) and almost no testosterone (the male hormone.)
The physician began to explain what was happening to Aaron’s body, why, and what we could do about the situation. Aaron had physically changed so much; we withdrew him from school and began home schooling. The kids at his junior high were beginning to tease him for his large breasts and feminine traits. Aaron’s specialist explained to us Aaron was producing excessive estrogen due to the female glands in his breasts. The only way the production of estrogen would cease was Aaron would need to undergo a radical double mastectomy. Since Blaine was so young, he felt Blaine’s excess skin could be removed and his chest would grow into any extra loose skin. The Endocrinologist handed me a business card of a Pediatric Surgeon who specialized specifically in Aaron’s situation. He informed us Aaron’s adult height would be 6’6”. They knew this because of his hand X-Ray. They measure the growth plates in the child’s hand and can calculate the person’s ultimate height. Aaron is 25 years old now and in fact he is 6’6”.
We gathered in the sitting room of our home discussing our newfound information. Ultimately my husband and I felt, it was Aaron’s body, and he was the person who ultimately would be affected in life with the major surgeries facing him. My husband and I were blessed financially to provide the funding for any future procedures Aaron and his plastic surgeon felt was necessary. The insurance companies, felt this was not a necessary procedure, they considered it, “cosmetic.” I do not understand how any insurance company would consider a male child developing in adolence as a female, would be considered “cosmetic.” These surgeries were necessary because in the future, if left unchecked, all female diseases would and still may apply to our son. This includes, breast cancer, osteoporosis and any other diseases which affects the female population greater than the male population. I feel the same of insurance companies covering the pill, Viagra for men, yet they do not cover birth control for women. These procedures were necessary for Aaron’s mental well-being as much as his physical short and long term health.
Aaron made the decision he desperately wanted to proceed with the surgeries that lay ahead. Five surgeries, and five years later, the surgeries were complete. His plastic surgeon said his breasts were the largest she had ever removed from a male patient. The complete removal of his breast and glands took two grueling surgeries. Aaron would need recovery time between each surgery. His nipples were inverted, even before the first surgery. Special filler was placed under each nipple, to keep them from inverting. The reason this was necessary was because the inverted nipples became infected. Typically nipples have tissue under the nipple, in Aaron’s case they did not. To reduce the size of the nipple, they had to be removed from his now flat chest and trimmed to the size of a male nipple and replaced. Then the estrogen slowed way down and the testosterone increased. This was what we were hoping would happen. When a male waits until he is older, he misses the chance of producing his own testosterone and will take testosterone injections for life. Fortunately, Aaron did not miss his window of opportunity. His testosterone kicked in and his voice dropped, he grew an Adam’s apple, and grew male facial and body hair. He still had female fat around the middle section and was not and would never be able to acquire a “six pack” (the muscles visible under the skin on a male’s chest.)
High School came and his shoulders were narrower than his hips. These surgeries were optional, in other words they would not affect his health. However, to look more male, he decided to have what ended being two more liposuction type surgeries. Both surgeries concentrated on his mid- section. The first surgery was to remove the typical female belly fat. The second surgery was to shape and contour his upper torso to look male. By this time Aaron felt good about himself. He felt “normal” again. He could have undergone one more surgery, hip reduction. He decided against it. He was happy with the outcome of his other surgeries. However, he still speaks about hip reduction and if he chooses, will undergo one more surgery.
I asked Aaron not long ago, if he was happy with the decision he made so very long ago. He looked at me and with tears in his eyes, he said, “I would rather be gay than a freak.”
¶ Please feel free to add any questions or comments.
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